He knew there was something about the girl the moment he saw her. The warm hand that rested in his when he greeted her, the dark, soulful eyes that looked into his--almost adoringly for a moment, but perhaps only because she had to look so far up to see him--the slender curves of her small body, the mounds of soft, dark hair on her head, were all too much for him at once. For the second time in his life, he was lost for words. The first time was when he met the woman that was to be his wife.

"This is Emily," his third son told him quickly, quietly as usual, but also with a little pride. Of course, any man would have been proud to have this girl on his arm. She wasn't strikingly beautiful, but she had energy, an inner glow that made her radiate with warmth, that made him feel eternally happy simply to be around her. She was a bit giggly, which was acceptable considering that she was only nineteen. Her movements were fluid, and she had a sweet way of grasping whatever necklace she had around her neck, looking down at the floor and drawing a line on the floor with her toe if she was feeling bashful or embarrassed about something.

"Aw, come on, Justin!" Emily demanded in a childlike voice. "Why don't you want to dance with me?"

"I just don't wanna," Justin whined. Emily tugged on his arm, but he didn't budge.

"Fine, I'll go find somebody else to dance with!" She looked around and came to the sudden realization that there was no one there that she knew very well.

Dean suddenly appeared at Emily's side. "Looking for a dance partner?"

Emily quickly looked around and asked, "Um... where's....?"

"Elsie? She's a bit tired. I think she had a little too much to drink tonight."

Emily looked questioningly back at Justin.

"You said you wanted to dance," said Justin. "So go dance."

She looked back up at Dean, wondering how she was going to successfully dance with him, as he towered over her by at least a foot. Apparently he had some sort of plan, since he held his hand out to her. She gulped and took his hand, and he led her out to the dance floor.

Dean put one hand on Emily's waist and held her other hand. She thought his hand was a bit low--it was almost to her hip--so she firmly moved it up a couple of inches. She then rested her arm in the crook of his arm, because she could not comfortably reach his shoulder.

She discovered that he was surprisingly light on his feet, and he was very patient with her clumsy steps. She finally got the hang of waltzing, and their dance continued smoothly.

"You're a very good dancer, Mr. Johansen," Emily chirped.

"Please, call me Dean," he replied.

"Okay... Dean," said Emily. The name felt strange coming out of her mouth. She had never called Justin's parents by their first names, and rarely by Mr. and Mrs. Johansen--if she needed their attention, she had always managed to find some other way to attain it. But the thought crossed her mind that this was perhaps a name she could become very comfortable saying.

Fortunately, she thought, she saw nobody giving them strange looks as they danced. Everyone was caught up in dancing, drinking and socializing. But as she and Dean parted from the dance floor, she caught a glimpse of Rachel, who looked away from a conversation with her parents to give Emily a serious look. Emily grinned sheepishly back at Rachel and skipped off happily to find Justin, who had disappeared from his table.

She went outside to get a breath of fresh air, and to see if Justin was outside. She found Brent, just then arriving at an outdoor table.

"That was the goofiest-looking dance I ever saw," said Brent, laughing a little.

"You saw that?"

"Yeah. I think I was, like, one of four people that did. You're so tiny compared to my dad."

"Well, imagine if it was Joelle. I'll bet that'd look even goofier. Where is she, anyway?"

"Bathroom. She has to go three times as much as everyone else."

"Have you seen Justin?"

"Not out here."

"Well, I suppose I'll have to go look for him somewhere else," she replied in dismay. "But it's getting kinda hot in there."

"It didn't feel too bad to me."

"When you're dancing, though, that really gets the blood running fast."

"You look kinda flushed. Or are you just blushing?"

"Blushing? No! I just haven't had that much exercise in a while, that's all. I'll just stay out here and cool off for a bit."

"And then go in for another round?"

"Not with your dad. That felt too weird for me."

"That's why you're blushing?"

"Dude...." Emily trailed off thoughtfully, not wanting to know what thoughts were running through Brent's head. "I think I'm gonna go see if Justin's inside." She walked off, passing Joelle along the way, and disappeared into the reception hall in search of her boyfriend.

Emily heard someone coming down the stairs and felt a wave of fear wash over her, although she had no reason to be afraid. She was relieved to see that it was only Joelle coming into the dining room.

"Can't sleep?" Joelle asked.

"Nah," Emily replied. "That bed's awful. Justin gave me the side where there's a big metal thing poking into my head."

"Well, when the twins don't sleep, I don't sleep," said Joelle. "I'm actually pretty wide awake. I don't think I could sleep, even if I wasn't being kicked in the stomach."

"I'm not that tired, either."

Joelle poked her head around to look in the living room, where Justin was sound asleep on the sofa bed. "He's dead sleeping, isn't he?"

"Yep. I don't see how he does it."

"I just think it's funny that they let you and Justin share a bed."

"Actually, Elsie wanted me to sleep in that room upstairs, the one with the two beds. And I just might do that, because they look a lot more comfy than that thing. Besides, Justin gets all sweaty at night because he wears all his clothes... he gets slimy! It's gross!"

"Yuck!"

"It is kind of surprising, though. Usually they don't like me staying the night at their house."

"Maybe it's because Dean's jealous."

"What?"

"He acts awfully weird around you. I've noticed it, anyway."

"Well, yeah, I have too, but... well, I don't know. I've told Justin about it, but I'm not sure I want to tell Elsie."

"Brent told me you two shared a very lovely dance at the wedding."

"Oh... well, that was only because Justin didn't want to dance," said Emily, feeling flustered. "And Elsie was kinda drunk."

"It makes people wonder, though. You'd better be careful."

"I will. I've been wondering what makes him act like that around me though."

"Well, you've seen their wedding picture, right? When Elsie was a lot younger?"

"Yeah, I've seen it. I know I kinda look like her."

"Maybe you remind Dean of when Elsie was younger."

"I don't know about that......."

Emily enjoyed family gatherings at the Johansen house. There was always lots of laughing and talking, although she and Justin usually did most of the listening. The occasion was Nick's birthday, and now there were two new babies to join in on the celebration.

Brent and Joelle came in, each with an infant carrier on their arms, and Elsie was the first to greet them. Emily looked at the babies and couldn't tell them apart, and blushed when she asked, "Which one's Amy and which one's Christine?" It was the first time she had seen the babies since their birth, and she was glad to see they were no longer red in color.

"Amy's in the purple, and Christine's in the pink," said Joelle. "We were afraid of them looking too much alike, so we decided not to get matching outfits for them."

Emily nodded. She took one last look at the sleeping babies before perching herself on a stool in a corner of the kitchen, watching the flurry of activity. Elsie was busy setting the table and asking Justin to help her, which he did rather slowly. Brent and Joelle took the babies into the living room. Dean and Nick were nowhere to be found, although Emily was quite sure Dean was in the next room. When the doorbell rang, she heard Nick's footsteps pounding up the stairs from the basement, and he went to the door and opened it for Scott and Rachel. Elsie announced that dinner was ready, and everyone gathered around the table and sat down while she and Justin brought the food to the table.

Dean engaged everyone in a prayer, giving special blessings to Nick on his nineteenth birthday, and dinner began. Emily was quite hungry and ate heartily, much to Elsie's delight. Elsie had voiced her concerns over Emily's recent, sudden weight loss, and Emily took this into consideration as she ate. If she ate more, it would be a good sign to Elsie, and she didn't want Elsie to suspect anything was wrong.

When everyone was done eating, Elsie cleared the table and brought out Nick's cake. Nick took the knife and cut himself the first piece of cake, which was rather large, and served smaller pieces to everyone else. Emily wasn't very hungry after her dinner, so she didn't mind the small piece of cake, but she heard protests from Elsie, Brent and Rachel. She and Justin simply sat quietly, eating their cake. Dean finished his cake, got up from the table, and headed up the stairs without saying a word to anyone.

Emily had noticed Joelle sniffling and rubbing her nose the entire time she had been in the house, but now she began sneezing loudly, and she finally asked, "You guys have a cat, don't you?"

"Oh, yes," said Elsie. "I almost forgot--I'm so sorry, Joelle. He must be around here somewhere." She got up and called for the cat while Emily took her plate and fork to the sink. Justin disappeared into the bathroom, and Elsie came back through the kitchen, carrying the fat cat.

"I suppose I can take him upstairs...." Elsie began.

"No, it's Justin's cat," said Nick. "He can do it."

"Justin's in the bathroom," said Elsie. "Emily, would you mind taking Cid upstairs and putting in Justin's room? And make sure you shut the door so he can't get back out."

"Sure," said Emily. She gathered the cat from Elsie's arms and took him upstairs. The stairway and the hallway upstairs were dark, but she knew her way to Justin's room. Cid required two hands to carry, so Emily pushed the bedroom door open with her foot, dropped the squirmy cat, and quickly closed the door. She started to head back down the hallway when she heard Dean's voice quietly call for her.

She turned around and saw him in the doorway of his bedroom. The light in his room was dim, and Emily could only see his silhouette in the doorway. She stood up straight for a moment, just to look at him, before finally approaching him.

"Emily," he half-whispered, "I'm sorry for the way I've been acting. I mean, there's just something... I couldn't deny it anymore, but...."

"I know," Emily whispered. She looked up at Dean, beseeching him to come closer. He responded by leaning down close to her face, their foreheads almost touching. "I'm twenty," she said. "You're fifty. And you're married. How would this ever...?"

She felt Dean's warm hand on her face. Closing her eyes, she leaned her face against his hand, letting him rub her cheek and run his hand through her hair. Then, suddenly, she felt nothing as Dean walked away, back into his room.

He stood a few feet away from the window, looking outside. Moonlight filled the room, casting a sort of pale light around Dean. Emily hovered behind him, just inside the doorway, clinging to her necklace. She waited for him, waited to see his face, to hear him say something--anything.

"Dean..." Emily said softly. "I can't... deny how I feel, either."

Dean turned around quickly. "How do you feel, Emily?"

"I think... I feel the same way that you do about me. That's what I'm... kinda hoping, actually." She twirled the chain of her necklace around her finger, not looking at Dean.

He approached her, and she pulled her hands away from her body as she looked up at him. He put his hands on her shoulders and sighed heavily, looking into her eyes. Then he pulled her close and held her. She leaned her face against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, and he wrapped his arms around her, stroking her long hair. She pulled away from him and looked up at him, preparing for him to kiss her, when she heard someone coming up the stairs.

She dashed out of the room, across the hall, and pretended to be closing the door to Justin's room just as Elsie came up the stairs.

"Poor Cid," Elsie said sadly as she walked by. "He's going to be so lonely in there. But at least Joelle's allergies won't be acting up. Did you make sure he had enough water?"

Emily simply nodded in response and headed back down the stairs. She wanted to give Dean and Elsie a chance to be alone, although she was quite certain that neither of them would take it.
 
 

Emily couldn't calm down the butterflies in her stomach as she pulled up in the Johansens' driveway. This was not the first time she had been to the Johansens' house without Justin, but it was the first time that she would really get to be alone with Dean--at least, willingly. That time in her room in Grand Haven didn't really count because she had been scared out of her mind. This time, she knew she was going to be alone with Dean, and it wouldn't be such a bad thing.

Serena answered the phone when Dean called the house that Saturday morning, and she handed Emily the phone with the most contorted-looking face she had ever seen. Dean informed Emily that Elsie had gone up north for the weekend, and Emily already knew that Justin was spending the night with some friends and probably wouldn't be back until later that afternoon.

"This is perfect timing, Emily," Dean told her, in that slow drawl of a voice that she was starting to love. "You can come over right now."

And that was exactly what Emily did. She showered quickly, threw on some clothes--most of them looked good, and Dean wouldn't care what she wore anyway--and she dashed out of the house, to her car, blowing by questioning glances from Serena and Tim along the way without telling them where she was going.

Now she got out of her car at the Johansens' house, and she felt her heart jump up into her throat. She wondered if she had been overriding her conscience for too long. She had too many conflicting feelings, and she didn't want to deal with them at the moment. She just wanted to see Dean again.

Before she could decide whether to knock or walk right in, Dean answered the door. He had been waiting for her in the living room. As she came in, he took her hand and turned her face toward him with a gentle look in his eyes--the eyes that had captured her heart.

"We're all alone here, you know."

Emily nodded. She reached up and touched his face, and he leaned down and pressed his forehead against hers, their noses barely touching. She longed to feel his lips against hers, but he still would not kiss her. She wondered what else they were going to do if they weren't going to kiss.

Just as she was quietly thinking about this, Dean stood up, then grabbed Emily and threw her over his shoulder. Emily gagged because his shoulder was digging into her stomach, and she flailed her arms to try to get a grip on something. All she could see was the floor and his backside from the waist down. He flipped her back over and carried her like a baby the rest of the way upstairs. She clung to his neck and looked adoringly into his eyes.

"Where are you taking me?" she asked innocently, half-giggling, knowing very well where he was taking her.

"You'll see," Dean replied. He pushed his bedroom door open with his foot and carried her inside. The room was very cold, and Emily noticed that the window was open just a crack--which she thought was crazy, considering that it was the middle of November and forty degrees outside. She hoped Dean would keep her warm.

He laid her gently on the bed, then walked across the room and closed the window. "I know you don't like being cold," he said. "You can cuddle up under those blankets if you want."

"You can come keep me warm," said Emily. She sat up Indian-style on the bed and kept her eyes on Dean as he went back to the bed and sat near her. He brushed her lips with his fingers, then trailed them down her neck and across her shoulder. He put his hands on her waist, and she raised hers to his shoulders. He drew her closer and buried his face in her neck. As she tightened her grip on his shoulders, she realized that this was perfect, this was right, and nothing was going to change that.

"What time is it?" Dean asked.

Emily sat up quickly, keeping the sheet close to her bare chest. She looked over at the clock and replied, "Quarter after twelve. You're too lazy to look yourself?"

"No... just tired," Dean replied. Emily laid down next to him, and he put an arm around her, resting his chin on her head. "You wore me out."

"Well, that's a good thing, isn't it?" Emily whispered.

"Mmm-hmm." He reached up and stroked her hair, taking in the scent of whatever she had used to wash her hair that day--it smelled sweet, like a flower of some sort. That was what she was--a soft, beautiful flower that would never fade or wilt.

He thought for a moment about Elsie. He knew part of what made him fall for this gentle girl that laid beside him was that she looked just like the gentle girl that had laid beside him many years before. He felt a small sting from his conscience, stemming from the underlying thought he had all this time that what he felt wasn't right. But now he finally had Emily, so small and soft and vulnerable, in the gentle protection of his arms. Right where she belonged.

He doubted Justin would ever be able to take care of her. She was the kind of girl that needed a real man, and although he hated to admit it, there wasn't much his son was capable of doing. He couldn't help it; it was just the way that he was born. Sometimes he didn't quite understand why Emily was with someone like Justin. She was smart and lively--she needed intellectual and emotional stimulation, things he knew Justin would never be able to provide for her.

She stirred gently and raised her face to his, her lips begging to be kissed. As badly as he wanted to kiss her, he knew he couldn't. Kissing her would be telling her that he loved her, and he still loved Elsie. But Elsie was never there anymore.

"You know, I think I've built up an appetite," Emily chirped. She sat up again, still keeping herself covered, and said, "I'm gonna go find something to eat."

Dean was amazed at how much energy this tiny girl had. He thought about taking her out to lunch, but the risk of being caught in public alone with her was too high. Trying to regain logical thought, he mentally rummaged through the kitchen cupboards to think of something he could feed her. He barely noticed as she put her clothes back on. When he mentally returned from the kitchen, he was surprised to see her kneeling on the end of the bed, fully dressed, looking at him expectantly.

"Well, aren't you gonna put your clothes back on?" she demanded.

"I suppose I should do that." He uncovered himself and sat up on the edge of the bed. Emily quickly turned away, as though she did not want to see him completely undressed. It occurred to him that she had barely looked at him, except for his face, while they were making love. He looked over his shoulder at her. She was sitting on the other side of the bed, her back turned to him. He finished getting dressed and walked over to where he could get a better view of her face. She did not look at him when he approached her, but continued to look out the window. He could not interpret the look on her face--she seemed thoughtful, sad and confused all at the same time.

"Are you okay?" Dean asked.

"Oh, I'm fine," she replied reassuringly. "Just kinda hungry. I think I'll go get myself something to eat." She stood up, and Dean was again reminded of how much he towered over her tiny frame--he must have been a foot taller than she was. He suddenly felt protective and fatherly towards her, this little girl, when just a short time before he had made passionate love to this woman. That was where he became confused, but he was too tired to deal with it. The girl was hungry, and she needed something to eat. He was feeling rather famished himself.

He followed Emily down to the kitchen. After wandering around the kitchen distraughtly for a few minutes, she finally said, "I think I'm gonna head back home for lunch. I mean, I have some stuff I need to do this afternoon anyway. And I think I'll try to find out where Justin's at. He's probably at Brandon's house."

As she turned to walk out the door, Dean caught her. He turned her around, holding her by the shoulders.

"Can I see you again?" he asked, looking into her wildly confused eyes. Then she softened in his arms and wrapped her arms around him, burying her little face in his chest.

"Of course you can," she said softly. "We'll work this out for some other time. I promise."

She lifted her face to him again and smiled sweetly. This time, he knew he couldn't resist.... He bent down and gently pressed his lips against her soft, tender ones. She kissed him lingeringly in response, then winked at him as she went out the door.

Emily returned to her house and found Serena on the computer, reading something for her online course. She tried to sneak by Serena into her room, but Serena quickly swiveled around in her chair and glared at her.

"Where were you off to in such a hurry this morning?" she demanded.

"Uh...." Emily could think of nothing to say.

"That was Justin's dad that called, right?"

"Yeah."

Serena looked Emily straight in the eye and asked, "You went to be with him, didn't you?"

Emily said nothing.

"You did! Emily, that's awful!"

"It wasn't awful, Serena...."

"You slept with a fifty-year-old guy who's married and who's your boyfriend's dad! That sounds pretty awful to me! Why do I even talk to you?"

Emily watched as her best friend turned her back on her. "You just don't understand. I don't even understand. Everything's happening so fast... I just had to do it."

"You know it's wrong."

"It's wrong... but it felt right."

"What about Justin?"

"What about him?"

"How are you going to tell him that you slept with his dad?"

"I'm not. We'll just pretend it never happened."

"Is it going to happen again?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"At least Justin's dad should know it's wrong. Isn't what you're doing illegal?"

"Not in Michigan, I don't think. Maybe in some other states. And his name's Dean."

"Well, whatever. I can't stop you, Emily. Just don't get pregnant. That would be a really big problem."

"At his age, I'm not sure if he's even capable of having any more kids. I'm still on the pill anyway."

"What is it you like so much about him? I mean, he's old enough to be your dad... he's, like, an old guy!"

"He's still built pretty well. He works out a lot more than Justin does. I didn't really look at him when we were doing it. I didn't want to be, like, totally grossed out."

"If he's as built as you say he is, he shouldn't look that bad."

"Well, you know how old guys get sometimes... all hairy and wrinkly and stuff. I was afraid of what I might see."

"Was he at least any good?"

Emily smiled slyly, then knelt down next to Serena's chair and said quietly, "Hell, yeah, he was good! He doesn't even need Viagra!"

"You are just pure evil."

"I know."

Serena sighed and turned back to the computer. "If you get caught and you get in trouble, don't come crying to me. I think Edward would be the man for that."

"And if you get caught with Adam and get in trouble, don't come crying to me!" Emily warned Serena as she got up and made her way back to her room.

Dean almost jumped out of his chair in the living room as he heard the garage door open. It was Sunday night, and that was probably Elsie, back from her trip. He slowly got up and headed toward the garage to help her unload her things, quickly looking around and making sure everything was in order. Seeing nothing amiss, he went to the garage, where Elsie already had the trunk of her car open.

"How was your trip?" Dean asked as he unloaded a small suitcase.

"Oh, it went perfectly," Elsie replied, grabbing a small duffel bag before slamming the trunk shut. "You know, it's nice to get away, even for just a weekend. Did everything go okay here?"

Dean nodded in response. Everything had gone okay for him, at least. He hadn't heard from Emily, except for one phone call to find out where Justin was at, and he wondered how she was doing. He followed Elsie upstairs and set her suitcase down in her bedroom.

"Whew! I think that's everything," said Elsie, unzipping her duffel bag. "I'm going to get these unpacked and head off to bed."

Dean stood in the doorway, waiting to hear something else from her--anything else. But she simply stood there, with her back turned to him, unpacking her clothes. He turned around, disappointed, and went back downstairs.

So that was it. That was how his wife would greet him when she came back from a trip, being away from him for three days. No wonder he needed Emily. He settled back down into his chair. Eventually, he heard Elsie come downstairs. Clad only in her nightgown and carrying a book, he watched as she went into the kitchen and pulled a glass from the cupboard. Then she picked up something on the counter, by the sink, and asked, "Dean, whose hairbrush is this?"

He was startled. He remembered watching Emily brush her hair in front of the kitchen mirror, grumbling about the fact that her hair, long and soft and lovely as he thought it was, never did what she wanted it to do. She must have accidentally left her hairbrush behind. Thinking quickly, he said, "I think that's Emily's. She left it there when she came to pick up Justin the other day. She hasn't been back here since then, so I imagine she'll be looking for it next time she comes over next time."

"Okay," Elsie replied, innocently accepting Dean's explanation. "I'll just leave it right here so she can find it." She took her glass of water and her book back upstairs, telling Dean "Good night" quickly on the way.

Dean went into the den and began absently looking through his files. He knew some of this work could be done tonight, but it could be done just as easily tomorrow by somebody else. Some of the office girls needed more work to do--they pushed enough of it off onto Justin anyway.

Justin. This would be all over if Emily told turn what was going on. They had never discussed that. Of course, Emily had told him of all the frustrations she had with Justin, but they had never talked about how they were going to keep this a secret. Dean was sure that Emily wouldn't talk--at least, not to Justin. Maybe to her weird gothic friend Serena, or that arrogant kid, Edward, but not to anyone else that was of importance to him. He wasnt sure about Emily's fidelity towards Justin up until this point, but if she needed a real man as much as he thought she did, he figured she had probably cheated on him with some other boy by now. And when those boys weren't good enough, she finally came to him.

He went upstairs and got ready for bed, with the realization that he would be alone in his bed again that night. He missed Emily already--just having her in bed next to him was satisfaction enough for him. When he finished getting ready for bed, he went into Elsie's room across the hall to check on her  she sometimes fell asleep with the lights on while reading a book. He found her sitting up in bed, slouched over, the book open and in her lap. He put the book away and carefully shifted her down so she was laying on the bed, then covered her up with her blanket, shut off the lights and left the room.
 
 

"And here comes yet another small town," Emily sighed, still staring out the, window. "Don't blink."

Dean chuckled a little. He was glad to see at least one familiar sight   a Burger King sign. "You hungry, Emily?"

"Oh... kinda, yeah. I only have a few dollars "

"Don't worry about it. This one's on me. We're in the middle of nowhere, so we can eat inside.”

Dean pulled into the parking lot, got out and stretched his legs. He could see Emily bouncing up and down a little bit on the other side of the car. She followed him to the door, half running to keep up with his normal walk. He opened the door for her, and they went inside.

Dean immediately recognized one of his old colleagues Stan Garner, from the office where he worked when he was first starting as a lawyer standing in line when he went in the door. As they greeted each other cordially, Dean tried to think of some way to excuse Emily's presence.

"Well, who's the girl?" Stan asked, looking at Emily, "Seems a little shy there, huh?"

“This is my daughter, Emily," Dean replied, putting an arm around Emily. He looked at her, and she gave him a questioning look.

"Your daughter? I think I only heard about the boys... hut it's been a long time."

"Well, she's our youngest  we finally did end up having a girl."

"How old are you, Emily?" Start asked, leaning closer and looking Emily in the eye.

Dean hadn't expected this question, and hoped Emily wouldn't tell her true age, since he knew that Stan probably knew how old Nick was. "Sixteen," she replied cheerily, and Dean held back a sigh of relief, "I was the surprise baby, after Nick."

"Well, I suppose you were! Maybe that's why I never heard of you. You look just like your mother. And you must be pretty well protected with four big brothers, huh?"

"Oh, yeah" Emily giggled.

"Well, I see it's just the two of you   where's everyone else?"

"We're headed to Greenville. to visit some of Elsie's family," Dean fibbed. "Elsie and the boys are already there, but Emily here had band practice today, so we told them we'd catch up with them as soon as we could."'

"Band, huh? What instrument do you play?"

"Trumpet," Emily replied. Dean smiled, knowing. that at least she was telling the truth about something.

"Oh, I'm up," said Stan, noticing, he was next in line. He placed his order with the cashier, then turned back to Dean and Emily and. asked, "You guys staying hereto eat?"

"Nah," Dean replied. "We're gonna hit the road after this. I was letting Emily drive, but she doesn't like drive throughs."

"How else are you going to learn unless you practice?" Stan asked, laughing a little. "You never know, they might throw that one at you on the driving test."

"Ehh.. I'll learn when I feel like it," Emily growled. She had mentioned to Dean before that she was involved with theater for a while, and Dean thought this was why she was doing so well with all these questions.

Dean and Emily finally ordered their food, and they parted, Dean giving Stan cordial farewells and good wishes. When they got outside, Emily grabbed Dean's arm and exclaimed, "You are so good!"

"That was a close one," said Dean. "You're pretty good too, Emily. Anyone would guess your age at around sixteen anyway."

"Hey, now!" Emily protested.

"Now, I just wonder how I'm going to eat this messy cheeseburger while I'm driving," said Dean. "'And you have one, too."

"Well," Emily said, just before ducking into the car, "we can stop somewhere else."

Dean got in the car, suddenly becoming thrilled just at how close he was to Emily. "Stop somewhere else? he asked.

"Yeah," said Emily. "Someplace out of the way... quiet... and maybe we can have a picnic. And we don't have to leave right away."

Dean quickly looked around the car to make sure no one was around that could see them. Then he leaned over, kissed Emily, and said, "I think that sounds like a very good idea." He started up the car, and they left the parking lot and went back out to the road. Although he knew keeping his eye on the road was his first responsibility, lie could hardly tear his eyes away from Emily's warmly smiling face.

"This looks like a good spot," Emily said when they arrived at the end of a dirt road. Not even any houses were visible—there was nothing but old, dead cornfields for miles, A thick forest stood at the end of the road. "This really is the middle of nowhere."

"You think any cars are gonna come down here?" Dean asked.

"I thought you would know that," said Emily, crossing her arms. "Of course not!"

"Yeah, I suppose I should have known that," said Dean.

Emily got her cheeseburger and fries out of the sack and gave the rest to Dean. As she sat there, quietly munching, she thought about the man sitting so closely next to her. She sometimes felt herself growing impatient with him--not nearly as much as she did with Justin--and she wondered if it was because of all the covering up they had to do. She wondered how she had landed the fate of falling in love with a married man so much older than she was--how did this happen to a twenty year old girl? She was tired of faking everything with Justin all the time, now that she was becoming used to Dean and how much better he was  at everything. It wasn't the sex--Emily had ultimately decided that both Dean and Justin were about the same in bed, and she sometimes laughed at the thought that it must run in the family. It was the fact that she could have intellectual conversations with Dean She could talk with him about the books she was reading for her classes, the kinds of things she was learning, the kinds of things she thought about. She could talk about the things that meant so much to her--something she just couldn't do with Justin.

"Is that good?" Dean asked.

Emily nodded with a mouthful of cheeseburger. She was happy, being here with Dean, even if it was at the end of a dead end road in the middle of nowhere in the middle of December. The sun was out, and it was unusually warm for the time of year, but still too cold to eat outside. She finished her cheeseburger quickly and slurped on her soda, patiently waiting for Dean to finish his meal.

"Done already?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, I was kinda hungry," Emily replied. "It was pretty tasty,"

"You can listen to the radio if you want."

"Nah, I'm fine. I like it quiet like this."

"Do you have, a favorite radio station?"

Emily gritted her teeth. "Well, I kinda like. the oldies station."

Dean suddenly, stopped eating and looked towards Emily. She frowned in response to his surprised look.

"You really like the oldies station?" he asked.

"Yeah," Emily replied. "What"s wrong with that?"

"Nothing! It's just that... well, you're a little young..."

"I grew up on them," Emily explained, sitting back "It was all my parents listened to. Besides, I think the old songs have more meaning. You know, more meaningful lyrics than 'Oops, I Did It Again.'" As she said that, she tossed her head back and forth and raised the pitch of her voice, in what she knew was a horrible imitation of Britney Spears. Dean laughed.

"Who sings that? he asked.

"What, you don't know?" Emily demanded. Trying her imitation again, she said, "Like, it's Britney Spears, like, oh my God, totally!"

Dean laughed even harder. "You're a funny kid, Emily."

Emily felt slightly dismayed at that remark. He certainly didn't treat her like a kid in bed, so why was he calling her one? She leaned back in her seat, crossed her arms and looked out the window opposite of Dean. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as he turned on the radio and changed it to the oldies station.

She listened as the lyrics to a song that she loved played--I Saw Her Again Last Night by The Mamas and The Papas. She thought about how much the lyrics must have related to what Dean was thinking.

Every time I see that girl
You know I wanna lay down and die
But I really need that girl
Don't know why I'm livin' a lie
It makes me wanna cry

"Dean?" Emily asked over the music. She looked at him, and he looked at her questioningly in response.

"These lyrics..." she said thoughtfully. "They're exactly what you're thinking aren't they?"

Dean leaned back in his seat. "Exactly, Emily." He finished the last bite of his food and threw away the wrapper. Emily reached over and gently touched his hand.

"Dean," she said softly, "as long as we're out here..."

He looked at her, then leaned towards her and gave her a passionate kiss. She felt her whole body melt as his mouth melted into hers. She struggled quickly to unbuckle her seat belt as he desperately began pulling her towards him over the compartment and the parking brake between their seats, After a bit of a struggle, she finally ended up on his lap, her knees around his waist and her feet tucked underneath her, facing him and still desperately kissing him.

"Maybe the back seat would be a little more comfy," Emily said softly, touching Dean's nose with hers. "Have you ever done that before?"

"Let me show you what I've done," said Dean. Emily was small enough to climb into the back seat without getting out of the car, which she did successfully, but Dean had to get out of the car and get back in through the back door. They met in the back seat, and Emily was in his arms again. Their bodies entwined as they kissed fervently.

"Are we going to have enough room back here?" Emily asked, catching her breath. She fit quite comfortably in the back seat, but she wasn't sure how it would work out with Dean's sixfoot frame.

"We've got plenty of room," Dean reassured her. "Just let me... show you how it's done." His mouth moved down to her neck and he ran his hands over her body, thrusting them up under her shirt, as though he wanted too much all at once. Emily was surprised at how energetic he was.

"Getting a little excited there?" Emily giggled as Dean reached back to work on unhooking her bra.

"The fun's just starting," Dean replied gruffly.
 

Emily, went into the living room to cool off for a  moment. The kitchen was getting too hot, with everyone sitting in there and talking, and she was afraid she was going to be sick again. The living room, for some reason, had no heat and was considerably colder than any other room in the house., She: plopped down on the couch, leaned her head back and sighed heavily. Her leans were uncomfortably tight on her, and she was finding it difficult to breathe. She badly wanted to undo the button and the zipper just to get a breath, but knew she couldn't with all the people around. She jerked the pants down as far around her hips as they would go  they were meant to rest on her hips, after all.

"Emily, are you feeling okay?" Joelle asked as she came into the living room. The playpen and changing table were set up across the room from where Emily was sitting and Joelle lad Amy down on the changing table. As she worked on changing Amy's diaper, she shot a few glances over her shoulder at Emily.

"Pants too tight?" Joelle asked when she saw Emily pulling. down on them.

"Yeah."

"Yeah, kinda."

"Um... yeah."

"I know how that goes." Joelle fastened a fresh diaper around Amy's little bottom and put her pants back on. She turned around, looked Emily in the eye and asked, "Have you told them yet?'

"Uh... no,"

"But Justin knows, right?"

“Nope.”

"You have to at least tell him."

"Well, it's a long story..."

Just then, Elsie came into the room asking for the baby. Joelle gave Amy to Elsie, and as she was leaving the room, she looked back at Emily with a questioning took and mouthed, "Dean?"

Emily just nodded quickly  Joelle's mouth gaped open in surprise, and she nearly ran into the wall while following Elsie back into the kitchen.

"Joelle," Emily thought to herself, "please just keep quiet. Please..."

"I knew it!" Rachel exclaimed. "I knew it all along! Emily, why didn't you tell anyone?"

"It's obvious why she didn't tell anyone," said Joelle. "I mean, look at what would happen. Look at whats going to happen."

"Well, I did tell... two of my friends," Emily said meekly. "Nobody that anyone in this family really cared about. And I have a lot of dirt on both of them, so they would never tell anyone.

"'What I want to know," said Rachel, "is why. Why in the hell did you sleep with a fiftyyear old married guy to begin with?"

"It was his idea!"

“It takes two," said Joelle. "Or three, in this case."

"Three?" asked Rachel.

"Justin," Joelle replied.

"Oh. Well, I don't see how that would work... but whatever." Rachel curled her legs up tighter on Elsie's bed. All three had told the family that they wanted to go upstairs and talk privately about "girl stuff   " and the family complied. Now they were huddled up i Elsie's room Joelle and Rachel practically attacking Emily.

“Girl, you've gotten yourself into a pretty big mess here," said Joelle. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know," Emily said, sighing heavily and flopping back on the bed.

"This is the stuff that one of your stories would be made of," Rachel commented.

“I know," Emily groaned.

"'Just think," said Joelle, "a fifty year old guy a lawyer, a respected member of the community, married to a lovely woman with four children  sleeps with his son's cute twenty-year old girlfriend and gets her pregnant! Think of the... uh...."

"Headlines?" Rachel probed for an answer.

"No, that's not quite it," said Joelle.

"Controversy,"' Emily grumbled.

"Yeah, that's it!" said Rachel.

Emily got up and went to the door.

"Emily, what are you doing?" Joelle asked.

Emily said nothing. She opened the door and looked around in the hallway. Shutting the door, she turned back towards Joelle and Rachel and said, "We're safe."

"Oh, geez, I didn't even think about that," said Joelle. "Oops."
 

Emily absently poked at her salad, eating a leaf of lettuce here and there. The entire time, she felt as though her heart was sinking lower into her stomach, and she grew more tired and weary. She didn't know if it was caused by her pregnancy, or by the way Elsie was acting. It was probably both. She rested her face on her hand and continued rummaging through her salad with the other. Scott said something to Rachel, but Emily didn't comprehend it.

Finally, Elsie spoke. She set her fork down, folded her hands and propped her chin up on them, and looked straight across the table at Dean. Dean suddenly stopped eating and looked up from his food at Elsie.

"Dean," she asked quietly, "when did we acquire a daughter?"

Emily felt her heart nearly stop, and then begin pounding. She felt her face begin to flush, and she looked at Dean. He did not look at her, but continued to stare at Elsie with a mouthful of food. Finally, he smiled and said, "We have two of them sitting right here."

Although Emily knew he meant Joelle and Rachel, Elsie had only said “a daughter," not to imply more than one. She realized that Elsie must have somehow gotten in touch with Stan Garner. Unless Dean could come up with something exceptionally clever, it was all over now.

She looked around the table at everyone else. Rachel was obviously holding back laughter. Scott looked very alarmed and was looking quickly back and forth between his mother and father. Nick was barely paying attention, still hurriedly digging into his salad so he could finish eating before his gig that night. Brent looked concerned, waiting for his father to say something. Joelle gave Emily a sad and sympathetic look  she knew what was going to be next. And next to Emily, Justin became stiff and thoughtful, not looking up at anyone. Emily waited for him to ask, "What the hell's going on?" but he never did.

Elsie shook her head. “I talked to Stan Garner, Dean. Remember the last time you saw him?"

Dean nodded, preparing for the final blow.

"Burger King in Chesaning," said Elsie, half announcing it to everyone else. "Sometime in December. He said you were on your way to visit some people in Greenville  and Dean, we don't know anyone in Greenville. And you were there with what he called a cute little dark-haired girl that you introduced as your sixteen year old daughter."

Elsie stopped suddenly for a moment and Emily felt all eyes on her. Even Nick was paying attention now. When Elsie spoke again, she spoke quietly, and said, "Your daughter, Emily."

Emily caught Elsie's eye and suddenly could not hold back the tears. She bit her hp hard to keep from openly sobbing, but tears stung her eyes.

Elsie did not say another word. Emily figured she must have thought that everyone could figure out what happened from there. She couldn't look at Justin. She pushed herself away from the table, her chair making a loud noise against the floor. She nearly ran out of the kitchen, but Elsie shouted for her when she got to the doorway.

"Emily!" Elsie snapped. "Would you mind telling us what's going on, for those of us that don't understand?"

Emily turned back around and looked at the entire Johansen family, seated around the table. The only one whose face she couldn't see was Dean's  he was sitting with his back to her, his head bowed down and hands up in a fist, as though he was in prayer. Her place at the table was empty, was gone. She looked at Elsie, who seemed to be surprisingly calm throughout this whole mess. She showed no signs of crying, or a nervous breakdown, but only anger and disappointment. Emily knew that Elsie was generally a strong woman, but had her weak points. She finally decided just to blurt out the truth, even if it would break the heart of this woman who had been like her second mother. After all, it was only half her fault. She could escape quite easily, but Elsie would still have to deal with her husband.

Wiping the tears away from her reddened face and clearing her throat, Emily spoke. "Yes, I had an affair with him," she said, pointing to Dean, whose back was still turned to her, "And I'm pregnant, too.” She looked at Justin, who was staring at her, in shock and disbelief. She imagined herself in the studio of some talk show, the audience gasping and murmuring among themselves after her announcement.

"I have to go now," Emily managed to squeak out beyond choking up in tears. "Bye, Justin." She turned around and hurried out the door of the Johansen home for the last time.

On her way out to her car, Emily heard the front door open and shut again. Joelle and Rachel were rushing out of the house to catch up with her.

"Emily, wait!" Joelle shouted. Emily stopped in the middle of the street and waited for Joelle and Rachel. They half ran across the street to catch up with her. Rachel caught Emily in her arms and gave her a hug, then handed her over to Joelle, who also gave her a hug and slipped a small white envelope into her hand.

"Take this," said Joelle. "You'll need it."

"Do you have someplace to go?" asked Rachel.

Emily nodded. "I think I'll be okay."

"Let us know where you're at when you get there," said Joelle. "We won't tell anyone else. Promise."

"Thanks,'' Emily said, choking up again. She ducked into her car, started it up and waved good bye to Rachel and Joelle, who were walking back to the house, as she drove away.